Thoughts about the second baby

I think there are two things that every second time (or more) expectant mother worries about while pregnant.

1) How am I possibly going to care for TWO (or three or four) kids? Just when I think I was starting to perfect the mother of one business, I decide to shake things up and add another one to the mix. How crazy is that! With my kids being 2.5 years apart, I knew it wouldn't be easy. Calli is really becoming her own little person, very independent in so many ways, yet still needing her Mommy and Daddy. Could I balance the challenges of raising a toddler with the demands of a new baby? At the point of Serena's birth I think I was just beginning to forget how hard the baby days were and how slow they can seem to drag when you are there. I couldn't imagine having kids spaced farther and being even more removed from the baby days. It would be really tough to go back. But you know what? Things are working out better than I thought they would. Serena has blessed me not only with just her presence on this earth, but with being a generally happy baby. Calli cried a lot as a baby and Serena is the opposite, which certainly helps with keeping my sanity. I get decent amounts of sleep with her sleeping 7-8 hour stretches at night already. I guess I was just worried for nothing because two kids is probably a piece of cake compared to three or four.

And 2) How could I possibly love a second (or third or fourth) child as much as I love my first? I read all the books and articles online that reassure you that you can, in fact, love subsequent children as much as you love your firstborn. Before I got pregnant with Serena I thought that was silly; of course you can love all your children. I refused to let any such dumb thoughts into my head when I first got pregnant. But as the months wore on, the thoughts showed up. Could I really love a second child as much as I love Calli? She was my first everything: the first pregnancy, first baby, she made me a mother! The second child already had a lot to live up to. So I joined the ranks of every other pregnant mother who thinks (at least once) that they may not be able to love the next child as much as the first. But you know what? It really is true what the books say and it is indeed possible to love your second child as much as the first. I think it took me a bit longer to bond with Serena, but that is natural! I don't get to spend all day just gazing at her beautiful face because I have Calli to tend to as well. Calli and I spent 2.5 years alone to bond and Serena doesn't get that same luxery. She is still loved more than I could ever say though. And what she may not get from Mommy in one-on-one time she will make up for in having a sister. Calli had to wait 2.5 years to get a sister, but Serena got one the moment she came into the world. She sure is blessed.

And so am I.